Some 78% of respondents who will undoubtedly perish before the UK’s departure from the EU is actually finalised express satisfaction at the Leave vote delivered on June 23, as do 89% of people who will never have to spend a single day searching for work in a post-Brexit labour market.
“It’s marvellous, just marvellous,” commented one focus group member, Margaret Wainwright, 83, who will pass away peacefully in her sleep before Article 50 is ever activated. “I couldn’t be happier.”
“On the whole, I’m pleased with how it all turned out,” concurred Hugh Hattersley, 79, who, similarly, will die of his existing heart condition before he has to see a beleaguered European Union succumb to ultra-nationalist electoral insurgencies across the continent. “Very pleased.”
“Don’t get me wrong, there are long years of heavy lifting ahead, real back-breaking hard work, to try and make a success of it, but I’m not afraid of that,” the pensioner concluded, clutching at his chest from the effort of speaking as he laid himself back horizontally on his bed.
Attempts to gauge opinion worldwide have also been carried out, with results showing that individuals who are currently leading governments hostile to Britain, Europe and the West in general are the most positive of all demographics on the referendum’s outcome.