In what was described as “a thrilling display of inventiveness and American pageantry,” dozens of top quality commercials were shown for the first time over a three hour period last night in an American tradition known as the Super Bowl
Tens of thousands of people across the UK stayed up far past their bedtime last night to watch ground-breaking new American commercials leading to undignified amounts of yawning and attempts to shoehorn new slogans into innocent conversations.
“I know it’s more of an American thing but I always set aside the first Sunday night of February to stay up late and watch ads for things I can’t buy in this country,” said Paul Taylor. “The only problem is all the sport that they try to shove down your throat between commercials. It really breaks your focus. It seems to me like every year they try to fit in more at the expense of the ads.”
“Sure, staying up that late for just to be told what cars and crisps to buy was pretty knackering but I did at least manage to catch a bit of shut-eye during the sports.”
Some people have complained that the ads are becoming further diluted by the addition of musical interludes that barely try to sell anything at all. “There was this really long bit in the middle where Katy Perry sang with some sharks,” said Susheel Das. “I don’t really know what that was supposed to be advertising but I’m going to buy a few copied of her album to be safe. Christ I’m tired!”
Not everyone whittled away a few hours of their precious sleep watching the big show. Tom Stonebanks from Gloucester explains, “It’s not that I don’t enjoy American culture, I love material goods, it’s just that their version of football is way off. The pitch markings are all wrong for a start.”