Lost Schubert dubstep piece discovered



The sound of 19th Century Austria losing its fucking shit

A manuscript discovered in a Vienna attic is believed to be a long-lost Schubert ‘dubstep quartet’. Written in the last few months of Schubert’s life in 1828, ‘Der Schritt des Dub’ (The Step of Dub) proves conclusively that Schubert did in fact anticipate the development of dubstep by over 170 years.

Schubert scholars have heralded the manuscript as one of his greatest works. “Schubert’s late pieces, particularly the quartets, are famous for his musical experimentation,” said Professor Katherine Lowndes of the Royal College of Music. “But ‘Der Schritt des Dub’ is a monumental achievement. I mean, somehow he manages to create a convincingly sick wub effect with a cello.”

‘Der Schritt des Dub’ is structured in the traditional four movements of a string quartet: ‘I. Das Intrö, II: Der Bass, III: Die Shüffle, IV: Das Drop.’

Electronic music producer Skrillex explained that the quartet contained novel musical ideas not yet seen in twentieth century music. “There’s stuff in the third movement that most dubstep DJs would shit a brick if they heard. We’re talking classical counterpoint with syncopated portamento,” he said. “And the drop in the fourth movement followed by a coda that contains three successive drops…Franz really knew how to work those nasty beats.”

It is unknown how Schubert managed to write a dubstep quartet without any knowledge of 2-step garage, jungle, or dub, all traditionally viewed as necessary precursors to the genre. “How could a young Austrian on his deathbed conjure up some nasty beats with nineteenth century stringed instruments?” said Professor Lowndes. “It’s almost as if this is all an elaborate hoax that couldn’t possibly be true. Except of course we know that’s the one thing that it definitely isn’t.”

This is the biggest musical news since the discovery of Beethoven’s lost 10th Symphony (‘The Rap Battle’) several years ago.

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