In a shock move, Underground Magazine can reveal that David Cameron will use his speech at the Conservative Party Conference to announce his intention to leave the Conservative Party and join UKIP. The news answers recent media rumours about another high-profile defection.
“I did not take this decision lightly,” said Cameron in a private phonecall. “But for too long the Conservative Party leadership has been out of touch with the views of the increasingly right-wing British public, and that’s something I just can’t change in my role as Prime Minister.”
Mr Cameron went on to explain that his position on Europe was unchanged. “The fact remains, the best way to get a referendum on Europe is to vote me into Downing Street. Again.”
Although the move is seen by many as a blow to the already weakened Conservatives, Party Chairman Grant Shapps downplayed the announcement, arguing that Mr Cameron had been adrift from the party for some time. “He’s always been a fringe careerist, forget him,” said Shapps.
“It is a betrayal though,” Shapps added. “Even late last night, he was leaving voicemails with people saying how much he was looking forward to campaigning for a Conservative victory in 2015.”
Cameron’s announcement means he will resign his position and stand again in a by-election in his home constituency of Witney. He is expected to face only weak opposition from the local Conservative party membership, most of whom have already joined UKIP as well.
Speculation is already building as to who will step up to replace him as Prime Minister, with reports of Nick Clegg checking his phone every few minutes. So far only Vodafone have been in touch.
Some political analysts have commented that in making such a bold power play, Cameron has for once left his political rival Boris Johnson floundering in his wake. “Take that, Boris!” yelled Cameron, his eyes swivelling, as he pinned a massive purple pound to his suit jacket. “Who’s the eccentric right-wing one now?”
Early reports that Johnson has joined the EDL have yet to be confirmed.