The Mayor of London today revealed that he was being forced to seek a second job in order to augment his meagre £143K paycheck which is “just not enough to get by in this crazy city”
“It’s just not possible to live on anything less in London,” said Johnson. “I’ve taken to cycling to work because I can’t afford the tube, I’m making my own sandwiches every morning because Pret has gotten too expensive, but still I can barely afford a bottle of bubbly to help me wind down at the end of the week!”
The Mayor told gathered press that he was also looking for a place to live in the suburbs as “Prices anywhere within walking distance of the tube are ludicrous. Somewhere like Uxbridge of South Ruislip perhaps?”
“It’s all well and good working in central London,” said Johnson “But when it comes to existing, that’s another matter entirely.”
Sources close to the mayor say he has been asking old friends if they can get him a job in Westminster where they have managed to hold down lucrative positions for the past few year.
“I’m pretty sure I might have something for him in finance,” says pal George Osborne, “But I think Dave is a bit worried he’ll try and take his job. They’ve always had a chummy sort of rivalry, him and ‘Came-wrong’ as he used to call him.”