New figures released by the Office of National Statistics show that the UK is the fastest growing economy in the UK, a position it has maintained for at least the past three quarters.
Ministers have been quick to take credit. “In each of the thirteen years Labour was in power we were the slowest growing economy in the United Kingdom,” explained David Cameron, “We now know that under the coalition Britain has been the fastest growing economy in Britain.”
“This puts us well ahead of all the countries which aren’t beating us,” the Prime Minister added, pointing to a map with every country but the UK cut out.
Forecasts by the OBR suggest that Britain is likely to remain the fastest growing economy of all those situated just a little to the North-West of France that aren’t Ireland, into at least the near future. However, economic growth forecasts contain a large margin of error and can be infamously unreliable.
The Labour front bench has downplayed the findings, “Whilst these figures are encouraging, ordinary people have yet to see much tangible benefit. Let us not forget that the UK’s unemployment rate is still the highest in all of the UK and that GDP per capita is still at its lowest here compared to any other countries that occupy the same physical location,” said Ed Balls.