Reports are coming in that award-winning actor Philip Seymour Hoffman’s biggest regret following his death is that he missed the Super Bowl. Although the tragedy of a brilliant life and career cut short was no doubt disheartening, like all people living and deceased he acknowledged the greater importance of the showdown between the Seattle Seahawks and the Denver Broncos.
“Oh man, that was tonight?” Hoffman reportedly said upon arrival in Heaven. “Shit. I’d come to terms with leaving behind my loving family, brilliant career, and my brief but superlative existence in this vast and mysterious universe – but I can’t believe I forgot the Super Bowl!” St. Peter brought him up to date with a quick play by play, but according to Hoffman it “just wasn’t the same as the real deal”.
“They had the Red Hot Chili Peppers as well?” asked an incredulous Hoffman. “I guess the real tragedy here is the fact that I never lived to see Anthony Kiedis and Bruno Mars share a stage together.”
Despite his inspiring career which was only getting better and leaving behind a huge number of adoring friends and fans, angels close to Hoffman say missing the Super Bowl will continue to torture his immortal soul for some time.