A government funded study this week revealed that, contrary to popular assumptions, people under 25 do not actually need, or indeed want, their own houses to live in. The new research highlights how their natural youth and vigour makes them well suited to ‘exciting’ ‘mile a minute’ lives of fashionable destitution.
The study found that though a small percentage of the sample had nestled back in with their parents like grotesque human cuckoos, the majority of 20-somethings favoured the giddy thrill of casual hook ups and night after night on other people’s sofas, to the yawn-inducing banality of a permanent roof over their heads.
Alan Davenport, the studies co-ordinator commented “The overarching message here is that current policy designed to shut younger generations out of the housing market is just good sense. Concepts such as ‘home ownership’, a ‘fixed abode’ or ‘some sort of stability’ are inherently foreign to Generation Y, and it is not the preserve of an older and probably out of touch governmental elite to force their fuddy-duddy, stick-in-the-mud, values on these hip young vagabonds.”
The study also shone interesting light on the number of under 25s in employment who, in the absence of affordable housing, had taken to simply wandering the streets at night before loping back to their offices of a morning.
London in particular is awash with interns who simply wander through the night, walking forever towards the dawn. While this sounds bleak to responsible adults, they really do prefer it this way. “A place in the housing market would be the worst thing that could happen to me,” said one recent graduate. “To deprive us of our proudly nomadic and financially uncertain traditions would be the greatest injustice of all.”